I posted this on Facebook last year and it is even more true now than it was then... Merry Christmas!
On this Christmas day, I'm sitting here thinking what a lucky man I have become. When I was little, Christmas was a magical time. Santa Claus, decorating the house for Christmas, Mom putting carols on the stereo, Grandma's Christmas Cookies, eating meals with our entire family, midnight mass at church, presents, snow... It was magical and I truly loved it. As I grew older, I started to get a bit more jaded. Things were harder to handle, responsibilities and all... Family members not being able to come to the gatherings for whatever reasons, wanting time for myself, but I still enjoyed the season and seeing everyone. The feeling was nearly the same. In the early to mid-80s, my mid-teens and early 20's, we lost both of my grandfathers and my father. That was a drastic turn for me. Suddenly the season was different. Too many missing pieces. I am not one that is usually good with handling change, so I started to dislike the season. Then later we lost both grandmothers and the family gatherings that I loved so much stopped too. By then, I was married and had kids of my own and all the responsibility that entails. All this kept taking away what I thought were my feelings for Christmas. By the time of my divorce, I was a full fledged Grinch. Everyone who knows me knows that is the truth. I still enjoyed the giving of gifts and all, but all the rest was a hassle. The decorations and cooking and extra stuff to do and all. I was just NOT up for it at all. Any of it. Then I met my wife, LeaAnn. She still loved Christmas. Still loves it to this day! From 2003 she started slowly bringing me back along the path to having fun and family oriented Christmases. Every year lightening my mood and getting me to smile and do things I would have never done alone. She was slow and sneaky about it too. Had I figured out she was doing it, I probably would have fought it. 
Now, 16 years later, we decorate inside and outside the house, we have family dinners as much as possible even though we are strung out as a family all across the nation, we talk and laugh and look at the decorations around town, we give gifts and receive them too... We do it all. LeaAnn now knows she has brought me back to Christmas. It feels like it used to when I was little again. The happiness and the magic... the feelings deep down inside that were dormant for so long that I feared they were dead and gone. They are now all back and in full effect. And I fully accuse my wife of giving me the Christmas CPR. I ENJOY and LOVE the season again, and it is all due to her and her leading me slowly back to what it all means. Family, love, laughter, togetherness (even if it is cybernetic) and just that "Christmas season feeling." That fullness of love and appreciation and just... family. I guess you could say my heart has grown 10 sizes over the last few years. I'm no longer a Grinch, and I believe again. Thank you for believing that I still had that spark, my baby. You are my Christmas angel and my Mrs. Claus. 
And to the rest of our family and friends (after all, friends are the family you get to choose), even those recently departed from us... You all mean more to me than I could ever say or type here. YOU are why I am alive and here. All of you... 
Now, 16 years later, we decorate inside and outside the house, we have family dinners as much as possible even though we are strung out as a family all across the nation, we talk and laugh and look at the decorations around town, we give gifts and receive them too... We do it all. LeaAnn now knows she has brought me back to Christmas. It feels like it used to when I was little again. The happiness and the magic... the feelings deep down inside that were dormant for so long that I feared they were dead and gone. They are now all back and in full effect. And I fully accuse my wife of giving me the Christmas CPR. I ENJOY and LOVE the season again, and it is all due to her and her leading me slowly back to what it all means. Family, love, laughter, togetherness (even if it is cybernetic) and just that "Christmas season feeling." That fullness of love and appreciation and just... family. I guess you could say my heart has grown 10 sizes over the last few years. I'm no longer a Grinch, and I believe again. Thank you for believing that I still had that spark, my baby. You are my Christmas angel and my Mrs. Claus. And to the rest of our family and friends (after all, friends are the family you get to choose), even those recently departed from us... You all mean more to me than I could ever say or type here. YOU are why I am alive and here. All of you...
Merry Christmas to you all that have read to the end of this lengthy post. You are part of the reason the season is so meaningful. Love and respect and wishes of happiness and safety to you all! And Thank you all... Ho ho ho!
